I was in Hawaii, my mind fractured, I ended up on the street with my stilts and costume tucked under bushes covered in tarp.
Been in underground lava-caves with marine batteries running cosco widescreens, elite street folk.
I learnt from the other street dwellers the choreography required to get into rehab and put my head down and did that little dance and ended up being accepted into a rehab with a farm attached called Bridgehouse. I immediately began growing tomatoes because deep in my worldly goods were about 25 packets of Heirloom seeds I’d bought from a seed bank when performing at a site specific performance festival in Petaluma in what seemed like an earlier life.
I was two or three months into it when I got an email inviting me to perform at an event in China with Dado and Jonathan Freddes and others so went to the rehab boss-man and said,
“Hey, China wants me to go there and I want to go there but I promise I’ll be good and come straight back.”
He said, “I don’t think so. I don’t think you’re ready.”
And I said loudly with a plaintive tone.
“But it’s part of my journey!”
He shrugged and said.
“Well it’s your funeral.”
I fly off and do the gig. It’s about my sixth Chinese excursion and I know to expect it to be surreal on any number of levels.
The venue was still under construction, the road we drove to the green room was incrementally more paved each day.
It was a blossom festival and most of the trees had been transplanted a week or so prior and each had what looked like colostomy bags attached leaking blossom inducing fluids but the timing was wrong and they were all still bare.
I danced with some locals https://youtu.be/gqDz7mr1d1Q?t=68
Dado was the cameraman and he was to pull the plug on me later in the day.
Dado is a demented hunchback clown, good cameramen to have. It is known.
So I look at it as a little give and take. I partake in Ethnic dancing,
then I demonstrate a traditional laconic NZ form of comedy.
Later on at the main stage the seats filled up with elderly civilians and a significant number of senior military folk in full kit.
I decided to attempt to play 9 inch nails, ‘closer’ and sell it like a happy song betting on none of the audience being able to translate the lyrics over it’s bass and my silly stilt dance.
Part of the chorus includes the lyrics “I want to fuck you like an animal’
I had them all smiling and clapping til halfway through the second verse Dado pulled the plug.
To be honest he probably did it to defuse a potential international incident.
I’m on one leg balancing when the sound cuts out, I play it off and bow and exit.
I had so many elderly Chinese ladies on my side smiling and clapping. It was contextual comedy as far as I was concerned.
I made it work and I was wearing a camera on my head so may have footage. I've since searched high and low, footage illusive.
No other footage ever showed up so I think I was right in my guess, this audience was old enough to be pre-phone.
They were compliantly entertained. But I was livid.
I think Dado had a panic attack on my behalf.
And that’s OK. The rage bled out.
I got a verse , a chorus and part of the next verse into my bucket list
Part of the sociological charm of this clown vehicle I’ve constructed is its defiant unhappiness is allowed to freely experiment with societal norms.
As long as everyone’s happy that’s the main thing.
I went back to Hawaii and the farm afterwards..
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